Everybody knows that breaking up is hard to do.
It’s hard on the heart and the ego.
But the silver lining of losing a special someone…
…is knowing that your friends have your back.
Which is why losing a friend is 100% worse than losing a lover.
1. First of all, a romantic break-up may hurt, but at least you know where you stand.
When relationships end, people move out, see someone else, change their
Facebook status, and go their separate ways.
Facebook status, and go their separate ways.
But with a friend break-up, you may not even know what hit you.
Did you stop hanging out because you’re both busy, or because they’re avoiding you for some reason they never even told you about?
2. Mourning a romantic break-up means wearing your PJs while your friends give you chocolate and tell you how ~amazing~ you are.
It’s pretty socially acceptable to be a useless human in the weeks following the break-up of a serious romantic relationship, and friends and family are often more than happy to be by your side 24/7 in the early days.
But mourning a friend break-up means wondering if all the friends you shared are your friends or their friends now.
When you have a friend break-up, you might not be sure what other friends were collateral damage, and you’re less likely to be cut slack by the other people around you, even if it hurts just as much.
3. Rebounding after a romantic break-up: no-strings-attached sex with your office crush.
The end of a monogamous relationship hurts like hell, but also comes with the nice consolation prize of complete freedom.
Rebounding after a friend break-up: drinking the whole bottle of shit wine you used to share and watching your favourite bad reality TV alone.
You can’t re-create the intimacy of an old friendship.
4. Your social life after a romantic break-up: taking time to focus on your friendships, treating yourself, and reclaiming your independence.
Break-ups bring out the best in your friends and give you more time to focus on your interests and treating yo’self.
Your social life after a friend break-up: “Oh god, do I have to join a club or something now?”
Breaking up with a close friend can leave far fewer people to run to than an actual break-up – who do you call if you’ve fallen out with the person you do everything with?
Purging after a friend break-up: wondering if there’sanything you like that won’t remind you of them.
Goodbye hilarious logo T-shirt that was only funny to us, goodbye Sex and the CityDVD collection that will forever remind me of slumber party and wine weekends, goodbye funfetti cupcake Friday nights.
6. Finding someone new after a romantic break-up: online dating, singles nights, flirting like crazy.
Dating after a break-up is tough, but at least there’s a lot of ways to try to meet people.
Finding someone new after a friend break-up: “Why the fuck is there no Tinder for friends?”
Why did no one warn you that making new adult friends is really, really hard?
7. Facebook after a romantic break-up: cutting the cord with a clear status update.
Over. Done. Single. Hit me up or pity the hell out of me.
Facebook after a friend break-up: unfriend? Unfollow? Ignore? Keep liking their stuff like nothing ever happened? Silently fume every time they update?
WHAT IS THE PROTOCOL? What if you were listed as family members? How do you begin?!
8. Instagram after a romantic break-up: you looking your hottest + weepy quotes.
You’re mourning, you’re growing, you’re strong, independent, deep, and wise af.
Instagram after a friend break-up: painstakingly prepared lunches for one.
So many pictures of your lunch and your book, or just complete absence because you can’t bear to see your ex-friend at brunch with someone else.
9. Twitter after a romantic break-up: sliding into a new crush’s DMs like…
Twitter after a friend break-up: 0 retweets, 0 likes, 0 replies.
Your ex-friend is the only person who got your lame jokes.
10. Bumping into your ex-partner: flaunting how amazing you look and how awesome your life is now.
Even if you’re not looking fab when you run into them, you can just say you were out last night with a new beau and you’re just too busy living your life to the fullest to care about your hair right now.
Bumping into your ex-friend: weirdly and passive-aggressively pretending you’re still friends.
Somehow, saying “Oh, I was out ALL NIGHT with my NEW friend” just doesn’t ring as sweet.
11. Parties after a romantic break-up: “I’m a free agent and I will do me tonight.”
The freedom that comes with singledom can mean staying later at parties, meeting new people, and exploring yourself in a way you didn’t when you were rushing home to your ex.
Parties after a friend break-up: “How do I even talk to other humans?”
Showing up at a party without your wingman is crazy rough, though.
12. Reinventing yourself after a romantic break-up: getting a daring and awesome new haircut.
Welcome to the next chapter of your life.
Reinventing yourself after a friend break-up: accepting your life as a solitary creature and referring to yourself as your own best friend.
“This is my cat, Emily Dickinson.”
13. Drunk-dialling your ex-partner: Embarrassing, but likely to be ignored or end in unhealthy but satisfying post-break-up hook-up.
Not recommended, but who hasn’t?
Drunk-dialling your ex-friend: truly the saddest thing that ever happened.
Let’s be honest, there is no chance of a random late-night brownie-making session like old times.
14. Music after a romantic break-up: escaping with that go-to playlist of sad songs that completely get you.
♫We are never, ever getting back together.♫
Music after a friend break-up: trying to find a single song about losing a friend and wondering if you’re literally the only person on the planet this has ever happened to.
It seems like musicians only lose friends when they die, which is a little extreme and doesn’t really capture your anger, amiright?
15. Letting it all out after a romantic break-up: Crying on all your friends’ shoulders and going home to eat your parents’ food.
Nobody can handle a break-up better than your mum.
Letting it all out after a friend break-up: starting an anonymous blog to bitch about how they ruined your life.
Your mum is great with matters of the heart, but she doesn’t quite get it when it comes to friend break-ups. She’s sure you’ll either move on or make up, so you’ll have to take to the internet to air out your grievances.
16. Hangovers after a romantic break-up: eating as much gross, greasy hangover cures as you want because you are your own boss now.
Fry ups and dirty kitchens 4ever.
Hangovers after a friend break-up: eating the whole post-drinking pizza by yourself and holding your own hair back while you’re sick.
:( :( :(
17. Making new friends after a romantic break-up: bonding over nasty exes.
Nothing feels better than meeting somebody who knows what you’ve been through.
Making new friends after a friend break-up: definitely scary, but definitely possible.
After all, romantic break-up OR friend break-up…nothing feels better than meeting someone who knows what you’ve been through.